Change Your Daughter's Name

trying to reach uh Patricia, Patricia.

Speaker, who is this?

How you doing?

Listen, um, my name is Floyd.

Floyd.

I want to give you a call.

Your your daughter, she attends middle school, right?

Oh, what's your name again?

Floyd.

Floyd.

Uh-huh.

Okay, what can I do for you?

Uh, well, like I said, your your your daughter, she goes, she do go to f middle school, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

No, her name, her name is Derek.

Why you need to know that?

Okay, well, something wrong or something.

No, no, uh, no, no, nothing wrong.

I mean, don't I don't mean to alarm you or nothing like that, but let me see.

What you calling me for?

Well, here's here's the situation.

My daughter actually goes to middle school along along with with your daughter.

Okay.

And

it's it's a bit of a problem that that that has arisen that me and my wife just found out about.

Okay.

What they having some uh issues, Derek and your baby in in in some kind of like trouble or something?

No, no, no, no, no, nothing like that.

But I think you don't do with nobody at that school.

She don't mess with nobody.

She on the honor roll and everything.

I don't have no problems out of Derek.

Right.

Like none.

Okay.

I wasn't saying.

Let me no, let me tell you, Miss Miss Patricia, what the problem is.

See, my daughter name is Derek.

Okay.

So

and it just blew me and my wife away that it was another Derek that went to school.

Okay.

All right.

I don't know too many Derrickas.

That's the unique name.

That's cute, okay.

Right, right.

Well, here's the problem.

Me and my wife actually, you know, when it was time to name my child, we thought we was really picking a name that nobody uh would ever pick out for their daughter.

And to have another Derrica in the school, that blew us away.

And I I I guess the real reason why I'm trying to call you, Miss Patricia, see if if uh if there's something maybe we can work out, you know, maybe uh like your Derek, does she have a minute, wait, wait, middle name or nickname she can be called by, and opposed to both of 'em being Derek, you know, because we really wanted our child to be the only one with this name.

Okay, wait, wait, wait.

Wait the f up.

Now you calling me and you asking me to change my baby's name.

Well, I mean, you you you ain't really gotta legally change, I mean, but just start calling us something else, you know.

No, no, wait a minute.

So what you the naming police or something?

Do you know how many Anne's and Lewis's and Patricia's out there?

What if I asked everybody in in the United States to change their name from Patricia?

Do you know how crazy that is?

And I understand that.

You must be on drugs.

No, I what I'm trying to say is, you know, this this is something that we really have our baby girl was this name, and we didn't want nobody else to have this.

So I does your Derek have a middle name she can use?

Uh uh no.

We're gonna call her Derek, like we've been calling.

You name your baby D.

Let's call your baby D D.

You change y'all y'all change your baby name at the school.

I'm not calling I'm not calling my baby no D.

I don't give a s what you call it, but I'm not changing my baby name.

Hey, listen, okay, look.

Uh I'm trying to call you and handle this like adults, you know, but you seem to see you're gonna push my button and take me to another level.

Obviously, you ain't calling me trying to have no sh and doesn't ask me to change my baby name.

Call my baby something else at the school, because y'all want your baby name to be Derek and the only Derek in the school.

Hey, you know how many other kids at the damn school got the same name?

I understand that.

But for my baby girl, it ain't supposed to be like that.

Huh?

Well, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, go baby girl and your wife.

But, you know, I'm not changing my baby damn name.

Y'all call y'all baby D.

No, what I'm trying to do is get it rectified that we can call.

Well, how in the f you get my phone number?

I know that g school ain't giving you my number.

I I got your number.

Don't worry about it.

I got it.

The problem is that what we're talking about right now is can we what can we start calling your child?

I don't give a.

I know that school ain't called you and gave you my damn number.

Listen, ma'am.

All I'm trying to do is figure out what can we start calling your daughter.

Uh, Dana couldn't make she been being called.

You and your wife, y'all need to go down to the gile statistics office and get your baby name.

A conjugate, some other kind of g name for her.

But my baby's always keep the same damn name.

Let me explain something to you.

I've been trying to be calm with you.

You didn't lost your

find something else to call.

I'm gonna go, I'm gonna get all the other kids to call me.

How do you get my d number?

Don't worry about how I got the number.

Listen to what I'm trying to tell you.

If you don't find another name, I'ma start getting the kids to call your daughter something else.

You get them to call my baby something else.

I promise I'm whipping everybody's who called my baby something else.

You're gonna have to change your baby name.

I want my baby the name to be Derek.

Joe!

Joe, come up in here.

This isn't a good thing.

Excuse me.

My princess is supposed to be the only one named Derek.

How do you call your baby something else at the school?

I'm gonna have these kids starting tomorrow at school calling your daughter something else.

I'm not staying on this phone with you like this number.

Hang up my phone and don't call my daughter.

Let me tell you something.

I got one more thing I need to say to you.

You listen to me.

What?

Are you listening?

To me.

I'm listening to you.

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harbin Morning Show.

You just got pranked by your girlfriend.

I'm gonna get her.

Wait, oh that's oh, y'all my favorite body.

Yo, come here.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

You alright, baby?

Yes.

I'm gonna give her.

Your girlfriend.

You baby.

That is so oh I am so sorry.

Oh, but you got my nerves bad this morning.

Lord have mercy.

Lord, I gotta catch my breath.

I got one more thing I gotta ask you, darling.

What is?

What is the baddest?

I'm talking about the baddest radio show in the land.

Steve Harvey Morning Show.

I listen to y'all every morning.

Y'all go crazy.

Y'all crazy.

Lord have mercy.

Y'all got my blood pressure up this morning.

I love y'all.

I listen to y'all show every morning.

Hello?

Get back in there.

Hello, I'm done trying to read.