Too Loud at Church

Hello.

Uh hello, I'm trying to reach a sister.

This is she.

Uh, how you doing?

Uh I'm giving you a call on behalf of uh Baptist Church.

You you are a member there, am I right?

Yes, I am.

Okay.

Listen, um, I'm calling you.

They've they uh some of the members have gotten together and had a meeting and wanted me to give you a call.

Have uh it it seems that uh a lot of them are complaining about Sunday services that go on and wanted for me to give you a call on their behalf so that we can see if we can address the problem and talk to you diligently as possible and try to get the problem rectified.

What what's going on?

Well, it seems like that um a lot of uh of members are complaining.

I'm sorry, and what is your name again?

Uh my name is

uh uh I'm not actually a member of the church.

I've just been the one that they've been asked to give you a call and and try to talk on the members' behalf so maybe we can get this problem rectified that you ha that that they have uh as far as you are concerned.

Okay, go ahead.

What I'm just trying to see what this is in regards to.

Go ahead.

Well, it it seems like the members of the church are are complaining about that you're doing too much shouting at church on Sunday and and and you're it seems to be going on every Sunday, you running up and down the aisle and you shouting all over the place and it's Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Me, I I've been singled out about my shouting.

Is that what you're saying?

Well, evidently it's distracting, ma'am, that you that you you you you know you're you're you're distracting everyone from getting the word and listening to the word and being involved in the service.

And that's that's the purpose of the call is to see if we can get you to tone it down some.

Okay, so the the whole church is complaining about me shouting the way people run up and down the miles every Sunday and almost tearing cartwheels and flips and they singling me out complaining about me.

Well, ma'am, I don't know how it is that you can see everybody else doing cartwheels when you the ones that that they say is the one that's doing them.

Okay, well, how am I how am I being singled out?

Ma'am, all I'm saying is that they're saying that you're doing too much shouting and too much running at this church.

Now I I I'm I'm just the message.

Okay, well, but they they can't tell me how to shout.

They don't they can't tell me what's going on in my life, what's gonna keep me from praising God.

I and I they I mean they could just they they can go somewhere else with that, but they are not gonna tell me that I can't praise my God.

They don't know how good God has been to me.

I and and you know what I understand that.

I agree with you wholeheartedly, but it it's becoming a distraction.

I mean, well they they was at the point last night talking about should we put some seat belts on the pews so so you can stay down?

How are they gonna tell people they can't shout in church and praise God?

What what do we come to church for?

Well, you do come to you to be trying to praise God and get their own shout on and stop looking at me and worrying about what I'm doing.

We're gonna need you to quit running up and down these aisles and doing what you're not gonna- I'm sorry, sir.

You know, I I'm trying to stay calm.

I'm trying my best.

Whoo, Jesus, she

Sir, that that's not happening.

You can't tell me I gotta stop shouting.

Okay, ma'am, but let me ask you something.

Are you running now?

Aren't you just standing still talking?

No, because I'm I don't have to run right now.

Okay, I what I'm trying to get you to stop feeling like if I want to run up and down this street right now, I can run up and down the street and praise God.

But they're not gonna tell me to stop shouting at church.

Can we get you to be a little bit more reserved as what we see, ma'am?

Let me ask let me go ahead and go further on what they do.

I'll move out of the spirit move.

Okay, well let me move and tell you what they've told me.

Now go ahead with what they told you.

If we can't get to the point where you can, you know, tone it down, then we may have to ask you to leave.

Well let them ask me, who Jes Ooh Jesus

let them ask me, why would they want me to lead a church?

I've been at that church for 15 years.

I'm not leaving the church.

I'm gonna run up and down around the church.

I may even turn me some flips while my f up in the ass I feel like it.

Now now listen.

That's all I'm saying Okay, go ahead.

I'm gonna be there I'm going to I I am going to be there on Sunday mail and I have been the person that's been appointed to make sure that you're not running up and down these aisles and shouting like this.

You gonna have to keep yourself reserved so people can hear the word of God.

You are standing in people's word.

That's what you're doing.

You in the way of you know what if they come trying to send me down I'm gonna give them a word and it ain't gonna be a God.

And let them put that damn hands up on me here.

Now listen I'm telling you that now you could say I've been in that church fifteen years.

If I want to run dance shop jump scream whatever I want to do, I'm gonna do it and ain't nobody gonna stop me.

You're gonna have to stop this and Sunday this past Sunday was your last Sunday doing it and you're not finna do it this Sunday.

Well like I said just why let and I'm telling you could tell the urchins, the deacon board, the deaconess, the minister's wife or whoever else you want to tell let them put their hands on me and see if I don't swing on them.

I'm gonna come right up out the spirit and swing on the s I'm telling you that now because see sir you have really pushed me there I done tried I done tried my

tried to show that I'm safe and whatever but you make it you making me revert back to my old ways and you you really finna piss me off.

That's what you're finna do.

Okay well let me ask you this here where is the God at right now in you?

Where is the one that's right here?

It was the God was in me when I was trying to be called you at first to tell you don't be called me with this foolishness.

But now you made the other side of me raise up.

Well you didn't raise it up You didn't raise it up in me too.

Guess what?

Come Sunday, you're gonna sit your f in that pew and you ain't gonna say you know.

Oh, you call yourself a man a girl.

You can't take a long setting in the pew.

Okay, all right.

All right, we're gonna see how well my pew.

Matter of fact, first thing Sunday morning, I'm going to Pastor.

Oh yeah.

When you're deacon, wherever you are, whatever your name is, I'm gonna tell him about it.

Y'all let her ho how I'll give you my number, you need to lose it.

I would be talking to Pastor myself and letting him know about this situation.

You don't talk about it.

You don't know.

We can call Pastor right now.

We just passing okay.

You don't talk to Pastor.

I talk to Pastor.

I done been at this church fifteen years.

Like I said, and I'm telling Ooh, Jesus.

Gee Ooh, you you finna ooh Jesus.

See, just like this here.

You see how you calling on him and you standing.

Yeah, because I'm calling on him to keep me from just really going to curse you out right now, cause you done really hit my nerve.

I understand that.

But can you call on him uh Sunday from your pew?

I'll call on him from my pew, from the floor, from the poor pit, from the bath child pool, wherever I feel like it.

Now, how about that?

I don't wanna have to put you.

I'm not finna keep going round round with you either.

Now I'm I'm I'm gonna escort your butt right on out of that Sunday.

Now I guess we're all be having a prison ministry because that's how well we all gonna be after I finish whooping your f I got one more thing I need to say to you, lady.

Wait, you know what?

You better say it real quick, cause you finna talk to this operator.

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey morning show.

You just got pranked by your girl.

Oh you know oh see, you know what?

Oh, I'm oh, I'm oh, I'm gonna keep my butt.

Ooh, gee ooh, ooh Lord.

Okay.

Oh Jesus Your girl told me.

She's gonna shout all her way to heaven.

I promise you I'm gonna get him.

You see how people get when they tell you can't price it.

However, you made me say

my past thing, oh, I want my pastor on here this Jesus.

I got one more thing, baby.

Let me ask you something.

What is the baddest?

I'm talking about the baddest radio show in the land.

Come on, baby.

Y'all is a mess, I promise you.

Let's go, Cat Douglas.