Too Loud for Church

This is she.

Uh, how you doing?

Uh I'm giving you a call on behalf of uh Baptist Church.

You you are a member there, am I right?

Yes, I am.

Okay.

Listen, um, I'm calling you.

They they uh some of the members have gotten together and had a meeting and wanted me to give you a call.

Have uh it it seems that uh a lot of 'em are complaining about Sunday services that go on and wanted for me to give you a call on their behalf so that we can see if we can address the problem and talk to you diligently as possible and try to get the problem rectified.

What what's going on?

Well, it seems like that um a lot of uh of members are complaining.

I'm sorry, and what is your name again?

Uh my name is

uh uh I'm not actually a member of the church.

I've just been the one that they've been asked to give you a call and and try to talk on the members behalf so maybe we can get this problem rectified that you ha that they have uh as far as you are concerned.

Okay, go ahead.

What I'm just trying to see what this is in regards to.

Go ahead.

Well, i it seems like the members of the church are are complaining about that you're doing too much shouting at church on Sunday and and and you're it seems to be going on every Sunday, you running up and down the aisle and you shouting all over the place and it's Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Me, I I've been singled out about my shouting, is that what you're saying?

Well evidently it's distracting, ma'am, that you that you you you you know, you're you're you're distracting everyone from getting the word and listening to the word and being involved in the service.

And that's that's the purpose of the call is to see if we can get you to tone it down some.

Okay, so the the whole church is complaining about me shouting the way people run up and down the mile every Sunday and almost turn cartwheels and flips and they singling me out complaining about me.

W well, ma'am, I don't know how it is that you can see everybody else doing cardwheels when you the ones that that they say is the one that's doing 'em.

Okay, well, how am I how am I being singled out?

Ma'am, all I'm saying is is that they're saying that you're doing too much shouting and too much running at this church.

Now I I I'm I'm just the message.

Okay, well, but they they can't tell me how to shout.

They don't they can't tell me what's going on in my life what's gonna keep me from praising God.

I and I they I mean they could just they they could go somewhere else with that, but they are not gonna tell me that I can't praise my God.

They don't know how good God is getting to me.

I and and you know what I understand that.

I agree with you wholeheartedly, but it it's becoming a distraction.

I mean, well they they was at the point last night talking about should we put some seat belts on the pews so so you can stay down?

I always say we'll put some seat, but how are they gonna tell people they can't shout in church and praise God?

What what do we come to church for?

Well you do come to you to be trying to praise God and get their own shout on and stop looking at me and worrying about what I'm doing.

We gonna need you to quit running up and down these aisles and doing what's not gonna I'm sorry, sir.

You know, I I'm trying to stay calm.

I'm trying my best.

Who Jesus?

She's sir, that that's not happening.

You can't tell me I gotta stop shouting.

Okay, ma'am, but let me ask you something.

Are you running now?

Aren't you just standing still talking?

No, because I'm I don't have to run right now.

Okay, I what I'm trying to get you to I feel like if I want to run up and down this street right now, I can run up and down this street and praise God.

But they're not gonna tell me to stop shouting at church.

Can we get you to be a little bit more reserved as what we are see, ma'am, let me ask let me go ahead and go further on what they do.

I don't move I'll move how the spirit moves.

Okay, well let me move and tell you what they told me.

Now what they told you.

If we can't get to the point where you can, you know, tone it down, then we may have to ask you to leave.

Well, let them ask me, who ge who Jesus?

You let them ask me why would they want me to lead a church?

I've been at that church for fifteen years.

I'm not leaving the church.

I'm gonna run up and down the church.

Now, no, no, no, no, listen.

That's all I'm thinking.

Okay, go ahead.

I'm gonna be there because you're gonna be able to do it.

I'm going to I I am going to be there on Sunday, ma'am, and I have been the person that's been appointed to make sure that you're not running up and down these aisles and shouting like this.

You gonna have to keep yourself reserved so people can hear the word of God.

You are standing in people's word.

That's what you're doing.

You in the way of it?

If they come trying to sit me down, I'm gonna give them a word, and it ain't gonna be a God.

Let's just put that damn hands up on me here.

Now listen.

I'm telling you that now.

You could tell I done been in that church fifteen years.

If I want to run, dance, shout, jump, scream, whatever I want to do, I'm gonna do it.

It ain't nobody gonna stop me.

You're gonna have to stop this and Sunday, this past Sunday was your last Sunday doing it, and you're not finna do it this Sunday.

Well, like I said, just why let and I'm telling you could tell the urchins, the deacon boys, the deaconess, the minister's wives, or whoever else you want to tell.

Let them put their hands on me and see if I don't swing on them.

I'm gonna come right up out to spirit and swing on the I'm telling you that now.

Because see, sir, you done really pushed me there.

I done tried, I done tried my own.

Well, let me ask you this

I tried to show that I'm sane and remember, but you make it you making me revert back to my old ways, and you you really finna piss me off.

That's what you finna do.

Okay, well, let me ask you this here.

Where is the God at right now in you?

Where is the one that's not here?

It was the God was in me when I was trying to be calm with you at first and tell you don't be calling me with this foolishness.

But now you made the other side of me raise up.

Well, you didn't raise it up in you didn't raise it up in me too.

Guess what?

Come Sunday, you're gonna sit your f in that pew, and you ain't gonna say you know.

Oh, you call yourself a man to go in, you can't take your home and sit my f in the pew.

Okay, all right.

All right, we're gonna see how well my sit in that pew.

Matter of fact, first thing Sunday morning, I'm going to pass the oh yeah.

When you're deacon, whoever you are, whatever your name is, I'm gonna tell them about it.

Y'all let her however gave you my number, you need to lose it.

I would be talking to The pastor myself and letting him know about this situation.

You don't talk about you.

You don't have to know we can call Pastor right now.

We just passed out anyway.

You don't talk to Pastor.

I talk to Pastor.

I've been at this church 15 years.

Like I said, I'm telling you, ooh, Jesus.

G Ooh, you you finna ooh, Jesus.

No, no, no, no, no.

See, just like this here.

You see how you calling on him and you standing.

Yeah, because I'm calling on him to keep me from just really going to cuss you out right now.

Because you done really hit my nerve.

I understand that.

But can you call on him Sunday from your pew?

I'll call on him from my pew from the floor from the pull pit from the bathroom pool.

Wherever I feel like it.

Now, how about that?

I don't want to have to put you.

You know what?

I'm not even I'm not even finna keep going around and round with that.

I'm not finna keep going round around with you either.

I'm I'm gonna escort your butt right on out of that sunny.

So I'm telling you, now I guess we're all be having a prison ministry.

I got one more thing I need to say to you, lady.

You know what?

You better say it real quick because you're finna talk to this operator.

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey morning show.

You just got pranked by your girl.

Ooh, you know, oh see, you know what?

Oh, I'm oh, I'm oh, I'm gonna keep my butt.

Ooh, Lord.

See, you can have me up here cursing on the fucking Jesus.

Your girl's on me.

She's gonna shout all her way to heaven.

I promise you I'm gonna get him.

You see how people give when they tell you you can't praise it.

How ugly you made me say, Ooh, ooh, I hope my pastor.

Oh, I want my pastor on here this Jesus.

I got one more thing, baby.

Let me ask you something.

What is the baddest?

I'm talking about the baddest radio show in the land.

Steve Harvey Morning.

Oh, y'all is a mess.

I promise you.