Cars on the Street

Hello?

Uh I'm trying to reach uh Mr.

Mr.

Yeah, this is Mr.

Uh Mr.

How you doing?

Um doing fine.

My name.

I'm calling you.

I live down the street from you.

I'm about eight, eight, nine houses down the way.

Okay.

You you you are the one that fixed the cars, don't you down there?

That's correct, sir.

I've I fixed the cars.

Well, I've been fixing cars lately, sir, because I've been um laid off work, so I'm just trying to, you know, make an earnest living trying to support the family right about now.

Oh, oh, okay, I see.

Well what I was calling for now, now last week I don't know if one of your guys or somebody worked for you.

Somebody came and man parked on my grass at my house.

Uh huh.

Yeah, and I and I mean I got a little bit of oil on my sidewalk and and I don't you know.

Well look, uh I'm about to send well, I'm about to come out of there and clean that up, man, because uh, like I say, this how I make a honest living and I'm trying to keep all my neighborhoods and then all my neighbors, you know, happy or whatever while I'm working on these cars, 'cause you know, majority of my neighbors know now.

I I I guess you didn't know.

That's why you give me the phone call now, but uh I don't have no complaints on no other neighbors because I fix their cars all the time.

But um, if it was something left in the yard, I mean, you know, I can come up there myself and clean it up, sir.

Sorry about that, and that won't happen again.

Oh, oh, okay.

But now now last week I got somebody then came and took the little emblem off off my Mercedes Benz, you know.

And and I don't I I'm not saying it's one of Your people, but it's just so much activity down there.

That is

well, you know, they did the same thing to a old ponyac I was working on and I I didn't know what it was.

I think it's the youngins in the the neighborhood stealing cars or something.

But I um I'm pretty sure they didn't come from me down here because I don't steal MLM sir.

If anything, I put them back on the cars.

Oh okay, what l let me ask you this here, man.

How how long are you gonna have these cars on the street, you know?

Uh well I try to get them I try to do same day service.

So I try to get them in in the morning, get them out by the afternoon.

I try to do that.

But if um if that's not possible, uh I say about four days up to a week, the longest that there'll be on the street.

Okay, but nah, it's a Volkswagen two dollars down from you that it's been sitting there in front of them people house might near two months now.

Yeah, well I'm I'm I'm in the process of putting a brand new engine in album.

I'm sorry about that, but I try to park it, you know, out of the way of everybody.

But I'm you know, that's your a special project right there.

That's a special project I got.

I'm not really trying to raise no whole lot of trouble, man, but now I what pro one one of the biggest problems I'm having, when I got folks come visit me, you know, they ain't got nowhere to park.

They can't park on the street.

You got the street taking up with all your car.

You know, uh I I I can't have people coming over here and when they pass through there, y there's a car everywhere.

Ain't nowhere to park for nobody when people got visitors coming to their house.

Well, I'm sorry to hear that.

Let me look, I'm gonna tell you what you can do, boss.

I can give you my number and like a week ahead of time before you have company, let me know and I can move some of the cars out the way.

That's no problem.

I can do that for you, boss.

Why in the hell do I have to call you and get you uh uh notice on when I'm gonna have some cause I'm company?

That's my business when I'm gonna have a company.

I thought you understand I'm trying to raise my family, put food on the table.

Then you need to get you a shop, man.

You need to get a mechanic shop so people can well, you got a yard and stuff you can park these damn cars in.

Well man, that's what I'm trying to do, man.

I'll fix your cars for free anytime it breaks down.

I'm trying to get away.

Damn dealership.

I don't need the cat down there and have it sitting in front of somebody's house for two, three.

Let me explain something to you, Mr.

Here's what I didn't I done uh decided that I'm gonna do.

Now I'm just gonna call the homeowners association and see how they wanna handle this here.

But other than that, I really got a good notion to call the tow truck and come down there and just tow some of these damn cars out the way.

No, they just told your I'ma had this off the street, man.

I can't have no tow truck coming out here towing my cars, dog.

I got a pitch ball in the front, I got a pit ball in the back, and the ain't eating like three days, boss.

Don't have no tow truck come down here.

You feel what I'm saying?

Then get them cars off the damn street then.

You get them off the street.

I'm down in the sweating, boss.

Come on, man, don't do that to me, man.

I don't need no hookup, man.

I need you to move your damn cars.

You making the neighborhood look bad.

Oh, boss.

I'm calling the homeowners association and I'm getting them to move them cars if you don't move them.

I'ma have a tow truck out there this evening.

It's some boy look what I just tell you, dog.

Look, I'm chilling.

Look, let me finish doing these four-last cars and then I come eight houses down.

Man, you can talk.

Now if I see a tow truck come down here, I'm gonna come eight houses now and I'm knocking on your back door.

Let's work it out.

I don't care what you knock on, man.

You better move them down.

You got till six o'clock, man.

I'm telling you, man, I every gone within three days, man.

You got me cussing and everything that got a customer here, man.

I don't give a sh about your customer.

I give a sh about them damn cars that you got on the street.

And you have our eight houses now, park your in your yard.

You're gonna make me walk down there and tear you face to face on how this finna go.

That's what you're gonna make me shoot.

Which house you live in, man?

The left side of me or the right side of me, eight houses now.

I'm in the walking down in there with my dogs, man.

What's up?

Hey man, you ain't I'll come out there right now.

You ain't got to come to my house.

Come on, I'm walking.

I don't see you one side in the street on the all with these two balls.

What's up?

I'm on my way out there to see you and your dog.

But before I come out there, I got one more thing I want to say to you.

Is you listen to me right for man?

What the f you got to say, man?

I'm trying to fix the car.

What?

Is you listening?

I'm listening.

Just his nephew Tommy from the Steve Hobbin morning show.

You just got pranked by your boy.

Hey, hey, this nephew Tommy, man, from the Steve Harvey morning show, baby.

Oh.

That's a

man.

Oh, come on, man.

You ain't me scared as a m man.

I told the lady just pulled up.

I gotta change your mouth, man.

I'm gonna get that, baby.

I'm gonna get his way.

Hey man, I got one more thing I need to ask you, partner.

Let me ask you one more thing.

What is?

What is the baddest radio show in the land?

The Steve Hobbit morning show with that clear nephew time.

Hey, if my car ever break down, I'm bringing it to you.

Come on, hey, look, the first one free to sick on the children for baby.

All right, look at c can you fix a Maserati if it breaks down on me?

Man, I can fix a Maserati, I can fix a abstract train, I can fix a crane.

Whatever you bring, it can fit my driveway.