Sent Flowers to Your Wife

Hey man, I gotta ask to reach Bryce.

Yeah, that's right.

Hey Bryce, how you doing, man?

My name is Alvin, bro.

How you doing today?

I'm good, man.

What's up?

Hey, listen, um, I know you you you married Trisha uh to Tricia, right?

Yeah.

Well uh

who is it?

Okay, like I said, yeah, my name is Alvin.

And uh I'm just trying to make sure I got the right person, man.

Cause you um you have black, half white, right?

From what I understand.

Yeah, I'm halfway.

Who?

Who the f why why are you asking me questions?

What's for us?

Okay.

No, no, no, everything's cool, man.

Everything's cool.

Um uh Trish.

So check this out, man.

Okay, listen.

I'm at work, man.

Say what you need to say, what's happening?

Okay, listen, I actually deadly, I sent I sent Trisha some flowers for Valentine.

They're gonna get there on Friday.

But I accidentally put a, you know, uh, I ordered a gift card along with it, and they they put this gift card in Trisha's gift bag, and really that's that gift card should really be for my wife.

And I'm just trying to see if maybe if you get to the gift bag before, maybe you can get it out for me so I can get that gift card.

So you said uh you said my wife flowers for Valentine's Day, right?

Is that what you're saying?

Yeah, yeah, yeah but that that that's not the key.

The key is that my uh it's a gift card in there that I need.

You know?

Oh, so I accidentally sent a gift card to my wife.

You just want the flowers to go to her.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I sent the flowers Man.

Yeah, no problem.

No, yeah, cool, man.

I'm saying happens.

We make mistakes all the time.

Well, how about this?

How about you come on over and I I will be more than happy to uh give you the gift card because I'm sure you know if you send it with the flowers, I'll I'll just have to hand those the the gift card over to you, ain't it?

And probably a nice uh speeding to you, stupid mother.

Why in the f would you ever call me about this?

Hey man, I and I expect I didn't expect all this house.

Is it Alvin?

Hey bro, all I'm trying to do is like I said, I'm still I ain't here for fing bra.

What do you mean you're doing the you didn't think it's gonna be hostile?

You send my flowers, mother.

But how do you even know my wife?

How do you know Trish?

How do you know Trish?

I I work in I work in a building with uh Trish works in.

So you work with her?

Okay, good.

Are you gonna do it?

I don't work I don't work with her, I don't work for her company at all, but my my you know, my floor is on a different floor.

I work in a different company, but she works she works in the same building.

So yeah.

Dude, I'm just trying to get the gift card, man.

I ain't even trying to trip, dude.

I ain't so uh let me so you sent some flowers.

When when the flowers gonna be here, what time are the flowers supposed to be here?

The flowers get in there sometime Friday.

I mean on Valentine's Day Yep.

On Valentine's Day.

Okay, good, good.

So how about you come down here on Friday, okay?

And uh I will give the flowers to Trish, and I will give you the gift card.

And you mentioned uh if I was half black or half white, and I will I'm gonna hand and let you know uh that both sides are gonna beat your mother because you gotta be the most ignorant mother I've ever met in my god.

I don't care if you're green, blue, yellow, lavender, I don't know what the f you are, but you are the dumbest piece of sh I've ever met.

You come here Friday.

You come here and you're getting your wife will get her grip gift card and my w wife will get your flowers and everybody can be happy.

Hey dude, what's what's all this about, man?

Okay, so have you gone out with you guys wanting for lunch or you know, maybe a movie or I mean how much time have you spent with my wife?

I I ain't s I I ain't spent no time with her.

Why are you selling her now?

What do you mean you ain't spent no time with her?

How you you seem to know all about her?

You haven't gone out once and high with my wife?

No, I ain't never went out with her.

So you just have a crush on my wife and every time you you just accidentally sent some just bullshit to her?

Is that what's going on?

I didn't actually I didn't accidentally send the flowers.

I sent them because I wanted her to have she's a pretty she's a pretty lady.

I wanted her to have the flowers.

Oh, I didn't want her to, but I didn't want her to have my wife's gift card though.

What did you think I was gonna be there?

How did you think how many in your fing crazy bullshit mine did you think that this this was gonna be okay?

What if I called you right now be like, hey, I sent your wife a f uh, can you send it back to me?

Well, how would you feel if I did the same sh to you?

Well, I mean, you're talking about something different from flowers, and that seems a lot that sounds like a little bit offensive, don't you think?

Oh, that's offensive.

Yeah, man.

You know, I'm sorry.

Albert, you're is it Albert?

It's not Albert, it's Alvin.

No, it's Alvin, man.

It's Alvin.

I don't give a sh what it is.

Alvin, come see me on Friday.

I'm gonna have your gift card.

I'm super excited to meet you.

This is this is gonna be the best Valentine's Day of my fing life.

Come visit me.

She sent the flowers to the house, right?

I got the address that Tommy gave me.

Who the f is Tommy?

He the one gave me the address.

He he the one told me to how about you and Tommy come over to the house?

You can't have a we'll have a fing guy.

I'll I'll put on a game and have some pretzel.

Why don't you both come over here?

Okay, but why why why why all the hostility when somebody's showing your wife some nose?

No, there's no hostility whatsoever.

I just invited you and your boy Tommy to come to my house.

That's not hostile.

I'm being hospitable.

That's what it is.

It's hospitable.

Come see me.

Come see me.

Okay.

So let me ask you something.

Don't you take don't you drop Trish off to work every morning?

Yeah, I do.

I do.

Okay now.

When y'all when y'all riding to work, ain't y'all listening to the Steve Harvey morning show