Walmart TV Theft

Yeah, I mean, he's a little tall, you know.

He wasn't a small chap when he was born, he was ten pounds, but no, he's on the scale of right where he should be.

He's just a little, you know, taller because his daddy is tall.

But he's doing Okay, uh you so you you're you don't think he's anywhere in the in the ballpark of of of uh of obesity.

At two?

You mean fat?

I mean I didn't want to be blunt, but but but Miss Kathy, you're

I mean, I mean your son's a l let me just say, on a Sunday, I'm relaxing, and we talking about you think my son is a a little overweight or or what?

He's what's the problem?

Uh well, I I mean I I I I think he's fat, you know, and and and the problem I'm having here is I'm noticing the records of everything as

we need to back up to you think he's fat.

I've never spoken to you.

Mr.

Kirby, is that what you said?

My name is Kirby.

Okay.

So every morning that I drop him out for a year and I give my daycare money, Miss Benita has never said anything about his eating.

Habits.

So you're telling me that you think my son is fat?

Do you deal with him on a daily basis?

I don't deal with him on a daily basis.

What I'm looking at is records that are showing me that he's eating way more than the rest of anybody at the daycare.

And not only that, he's drinking probably a gallon of milk a day.

A gallon of milk.

Y'all only get snacks two times a day, and he's there only for breakfast and lunch.

And how in the hell is he drinking a gallon of milk?

And if he is drinking a gallon of milk, do you need to be in a gallon?

Yes, ma'am.

But all I know is this.

No, no, I'm blown away by this because you calling me on the Sunday calling my damn child fat.

That's the problem.

And your wife has never said a damn thing.

Never has she said one thing to me in a year when she collected my damn daycare money.

She ain't said my son is eating y'all at a house and home.

Okay, well, you know what?

My wife's a different person and she tries to be cordial with everyone.

She's the one who deals with me, Mr.

Kirby.

I've never met you.

Never met you.

Especially on a Sunday.

The reason why I'm calling you on a Sunday, ma'am, is that I know tomorrow if I you're gonna be trying to drop your son off.

Oh, I am gonna drop him off.

I am gonna drop him off.

No, no, that's that's kind of the reason why I'm calling you.

Now here's what we can do.

There's two alternatives here.

Either you can keep him at home.

No, I'm not keeping him at home.

My husband works and I work.

I'm dropping my damn son off at 6 30 like I do every morning.

Okay, ma'am.

Ma'am, ma'am, listen.

If if we can't get him on uh at the remote, you don't want to get Miss Benita on this phone because obviously you ain't the one that needs to be talking to me.

Because if you're not there every day and I deal with your wife.

Ma'am, I'm telling you that your son is too big to be.

And if he's eating at a house at home, I'll send him some extra.

But what I pay my money for is what you're gonna feed him for.

Two full meals and two snacks.

And if he needs extra, I'll put some in his bag.

But he's drinking a gallon of milk a day.

Are you looking at it?

I don't care.

There's no way possible that he can drink a gallon of milk a day.

Y'all, ma'am, here's here's here's the deal.

I don't want you to have to stop bringing your son.

And I'm not.

And I'm not.

Here's my second alternative.

I will put him on a diet, okay?

I'll give him an apple in the day.

You ain't no damn doctor.

You ain't are you from the health food program?

Ma'am, I will I will give him an apple and a glass of water in the morning and I'll give him an apple and a glass of water in the evening, and then you guys can feed him when he gets home.

You must be certified in the food program, especially if you're sitting up here telling me my damn son is going on a diet and he's not drinking no water and no apple.

He needs a full snack.

If the other kids is having an apple and water, then that's what you better be serving him.

But if that ain't the case, then hell no, he better get the full snack.

So if that's graham crackers and apple juice, well, damn it, that's what my son better be getting.

And if he wants extra, he better get it.

Ma'am, listen, all I'm trying to tell you is your son drank too much.

He drinks too much milk on a daily basis.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

You need to back at the f stop.

I know you did not cuss at me.

I know you didn't.

I did not cuss at you.

I caught myself.

Let me tell you one thing.

You ain't got to worry about it.

We don't have nothing else to talk about.

My husband, me, your wife, and everybody that works at that damn daycare better be there in the morning because at 6 30, we gonna be there.

And my son, he's coming all

week, and he's gonna eat all the week.

If he wants two gallons of milk, he gon' drink it.

If he wants two plates of food, he gon' get it.

Because I tell you what, we pay damn good money to come to that daycare.

So let me explain something.

If you don't bring your child up there, then I'm gonna have to put him on some slim fast.

Now, I I will put your child on slim fast.

I was trying not to go into this perspective, but I will.

Give him some slim fast, and you're gonna get a slim fast whooping.

I'm gonna whoop your f and whoever gave it to him.

Whoever gave it to him, they're gonna get a slim fast f<unk>ing whooping.

All them little kids better have some slim fast.

If he's getting some, he better eat whatever they eat and if they eat steak, well damn it, he better have some too.

If we had steak, he probably eat the whole damn cow.

He eat.

I don't care.

I pay for it, but he better not get no slim fast.

I will shut it the f down about my child.

Okay.

I I got something else you need to know about your son.

What the f else do I need to know besides you think my son is

overweight?

What the f else can you tell me today?

I need to tell you this.

I need to tell you that this is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey morning show.

Your girlfriend Lucretia got me to prank phone call you.

What the f did you just say?

What the f did you just say?

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Aubrey Morning Show.

Your girlfriend Lucretia got me to prank phone call you.

I'm gonna be sad to death.

She knows I don't play about my damn son at all.

That's my only son.

I don't play about him.

I'ma be there.

Is she there?

No, she's not.

It's on after this.

It is on.

It's all.

It is on.

Hey, I got one more thing I gotta ask you, baby.

What is?

What is the baddest?

And I mean the baddest radio show in the land.

This is Steve Harvey Morning Show.

Hello.

Hey, I'm trying to reach uh Alan.

This is Alan.

Alan, how you doing, man?

My name is Bobby, Bobby Booker.

Uh, what what can I do for you?

I got your number, man, from the uh from the hospital.

Uh did you just um within the last, I guess, three, four months, did you get a uh uh a heart transplant?

Within three months.

Three and a half months.

Yeah, I did.

I did.

Three and a half months ago.

Okay.

Are you with the uh are you uh are you with the hospital?

No, no, I'm not.

Um actually, you know, uh they gave me your number, man.

I hope you o okay with it, but you you you actually uh the the heart that you got was from from my brother, uh Troy.

Oh my god, really?

Yeah, that was my brother my brother.

I w I'm so sorry about your brother, but wow, I gotta tell you, he saved my life, man.