Always Parked At The Back

Hello.

Hello, I'm trying to reach uh uh James

Yeah, yeah, this me.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm here here.

Are you you brother James from the from the church from New Hall?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

This is me, Brother James.

Yeah.

Okay, let me ask you something, man.

You you and you with the uh my name Bernard, Bernard Collins.

You you with the um with the parking lot ministry.

You you um you one of the guys be in the parking lot on Sunday morning?

Yeah, man, that's me.

Yeah, yeah, so what's up?

What's what's wrong?

What's the what's the problem?

I'm sorry, I can I can't hear you that good.

Where you at?

Man, I'm on the road, man.

I'm driving and everything.

You calling me on my dog.

So what's the problem?

Yeah, I uh I'm do parking ministry.

What's going on?

Uh okay, look here.

This is what I'm glad.

I'm gonna try to make sure I got the right person.

So listen, my name is Bernard.

I got a black escalade.

I come to church every Sunday, and every Sunday, you always sending me to the back of the parking lot, and opposed to all the parking spaces being the front be open.

I don't know if y'all saving them for some of y'all friends or somebody y'all know or whatever.

But let me say this right here.

Let me go on because I've this it's been bothering me.

I'm telling you.

Right now.

Come Sunday, when I pull in there, if you put if you point me to the back to go park my car away in the back, when there's plenty of room up front, I'm telling you right now, I'm pulling this car over to the side.

I'm getting out of whooping your ass in that parking lot.

Because it don't make no sense.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Who the f is this?

This Bernard.

My name is Mark.

Yeah, Bernard.

I ain't scared to tell you.

I'm Bernard.

First of all, let me let me explain this shit to you.

We gotta park people in the back first.

Once we fill up the back and everything, then they will start moving them up to the front.

First of all, oh you know why the hell I'm even explaining this shit to you in the first place.

As a matter of fact, how the hell did you get my number?

I got your number from the uh uh the sec the church secretary.

I told her I needed to talk to whoever the parking lot, whoever over the parking lot ministry.

I talked to some dude named France, supposedly he the dude over the parking lot ministry.

He told me you the one working east it.

You know what?

Forget all this, because right now I don't really got time to talk to you and everything, because I'm at work and everything, driving on this road and stuff.

But what we can do Sunday morning, I will take you to the back and everything so we can see about this ass whooping that you supposed to that you claim that you're gonna give to me.

Oh, you go, you go get what did you think you can't get your ass whooped?

Man, f you.

Man, I don't understand y'all in the way.

Y'all want to come up here.

Think that y'all should be part this and that over here wanting me to park where you want to be part there.

I'm out there working hard.

Hey, hey, I ain't hey, I'm just gonna tell you this here.

No, I don't need you to tell me what you need to tell me is how I can go and whoop your ass when you come to just spam me down Sunday morning and I give you this ass whooping and everything.

And if I was you, I wouldn't even drive no damn black escalating because I'm gonna be looking at every escalate eyeing them down, really give an ass whooping.

You might get some old lady ass whooping because she in a black escalade.

You better come in a damn Toyota focus or something.

Tommy say, Tommy say you you you you you sent him to the Back too.

Tommy said you sent him back there.

I don't know who don't mother Tommy is.

You already know two Tommy is.

You made the you made him park in the back.

You've been making him park in the back.

Man, like I said before, I don't know who don't fam Tommy is.

Tommy, man, you know who Tommy is.

Nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey Morty show.

You just got pranked, baby.

Your boy Randall got me the prank phone call you.

Oh man, you got to be bullshit.

Oh.

Oh man.

I got something for him.

He's gonna be parking you in the back this Sunday.

Uh James, you alright, man?

Yeah, I'm about to run over somebody, pull over to the side, ready to get on and fight anybody.