Life Insurance Testicle Removal

Hello.

Hello, I'm trying to reach a Brian.

Brian Yeah, yeah, you see.

Hey Brian, this is Dr.

uh Jacob.

How are you doing today?

Yeah, yeah, I'm doing I'm doing very that's it.

I'm doing good.

Okay.

Listen, you actually came in uh maybe like two and a half weeks ago here to my office and got a physical for uh for life insurance.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, right.

Yeah.

Everything okay?

Uh well yeah, yeah, everything's gonna be pretty good.

I I'd like to see if I can get you to come in and um I I you know, uh everything's gonna be fine, but I got a small procedure we'd like to do to actually uh you know, right now you're not approved for your life insurance due until this procedure's done.

So if you don't mind coming in, we'd l we'd like to get you uh taken care of.

When can I schedule you to come in?

Like uh maybe uh tomorrow or the following day?

Yeah, well uh what what kind of procedure is it?

Well, actually I don't know if you've heard of it.

This is the ocheostomy.

Nah, I got something w what oh that's gonna do with my eyes or w with what's that.

So is it got something do with you, what now?

That's something doing my eyes, I ain't gonna hear it.

What with that?

No, no, okayostomy has nothing to do with the eyes.

No, nothing at all.

We found a little bit of um parasites in a particular area and what we want to do is make sure we just remove it completely and you'll be fine, you'll get your life insurance, you and your family will be great.

So can I get you to come in tomorrow or maybe Thursday afternoon?

That's fine.

What uh what what area I found the parasites in?

Actually one of your testicles has some parasites.

So what we're gonna do is what is let's call it a ocheostromy.

And ocheostomy is actually removing that testicle completely.

And then everything gonna be fine.

It's all confined and we'll be able to remove it.

You'll be on your way, you'll get your life insurance and everything will be fine, okay?

Like I said, can I get can I can I get you to come in tomorrow?

What what what what the f you gotta tell my testicle?

Well, only one.

Only one.

And it's not gonna take long, it's a thirty minute procedure.

But we want to get you to come in tomorrow or the next day.

Can we get you to what what day are you available?

I just went for a root piece.

Oftentimes when people come in for life insurance, these type of things happen.

So we want to get you in and get it out as quickly as possible.

Nah, man.

I'm I'm waiting for a routine physical, man.

I wasn't supposed to be checking all this extra stuff.

Man, I get a parasite in my testicle.

Y'all gonna remove a testicle, man?

I'm twenty-five.

Me and my wife, man, got no kids, man.

We try to build it, I gotta remove a testicle.

Let me say this to you, Brian.

You're gonna be completely fine.

You'll be able to create children.

You'll be able to live a normal life.

You know, you'll just be um you won't have all of them, but you'll have enough to create children.

You understand?

That's boy, that's f nah, man.

I can't nah, hey, it ain't gonna I can't come in for that.

Nah.

Sir, is there any way I can get you in tomorrow or tomorrow afternoon or or the Thursday afternoon, so we can kind of get this thing taken care of and we can get you moving on your way and the people can get the life insurance papers together and so forth.

Nah, man.

Man, we ain't rescheduling now.

I need a second or third opinion on on that, man.

You're talking about taking away one of my f man, we ain't rescheduling nothing, man.

I'm gonna need to see another doctor, man.

It's some Sir, sir.

You can go around the entire city and see several doctors.

I'm here to tell you you're just gonna be wasting time.

I'm gonna try to knock this thing out for you.

Knock it out.

I ain't agree I ain't agree to nothing.

This is a f man.

I just joined this to get money, man.

This is scheduling nothing, man.

I need second or third opinion.

It's glue.

Brian, I tell you, if you come in and let me get this thing taken care of, you know, I'll have you back, you know, big ball and shot calling before it's all over, you know?

What what what the f me, big ball and shot calling me?

I I told you, man, I ain't I ain't going in for none of that, man.

I don't suppose to tell my wife, man, this this ain't cool, man.

I ain't going in for that, man.

I'm rescheduling, man.

You resched you what do you mean you're rescheduling, sir?

What we I'm getting I'm getting another opinion, I ain't going in for that.

Okay, but I'm trying to make you a big baller, shot caller, you know?

Man, what the f what is your name?

Man, you supposed to be a doctor, you're making little jokes, man.

You doing a little play on words, man.

Ain't even funny, man.

I'm calling the insurance project telling they send me some doctor, man.

You think you're funny, it ain't it ain't funny, man.

You over here making little jokes, man.

That ain't funny, man.

I'm getting taking a penny man.

After getting all of the work that we got, the blood work, the urine work, the complete physical, that's when we realize that you had parasites in a particular area.

So what we're trying, I'm not, I don't mean I trying to make light of make humor in it just to make you feel a little bit more comfortable.

I apologize.

That ain't funny, man.

You ain't the one losing no man, that ain't funny, man.

If I had a situation, the nurse would have told me this.

We had to run tests on you, sir.

We got tests back.

Well, you do have the parasites, and what we want to do is make sure we get them completely cleared out.

The only way I can clear that out is to remove that testicle.

Man, this some b man.

I ain't got no d parasites, man.

Y'all be a running on these tests on me, man.

I'm going to another doctor, man, because this man I ain't got no parasites, man.

All these tests are talking about y'all running me, I got a removal.

That's some you over here making jokes.

I know you're a f doctor, man.

I ain't got no parasites, man.

I'm following my insurance.

I'm telling you I ain't dealing with your man, because you man, I ain't got no f parasites, man.

Brian, let me make you understand something clear here.

It's my job as a physician that if the patient doesn't come to me, it's my job to come to you and extract the problem.

You're leaning towards me having to come to your home and extract the problem.

Man, when you want to come to my own house, man, you a f I want you once to put the house and that's how the f testicles, man.

You

talking, I'm going to another doctor, I'm getting another chance, and they're gonna I ain't got no d parasites.

Sir, you got the parasites and you only have twenty-four hours for me to get you.

I ain't got you, sir.

I have to move on this quickly, Brian.

Okay.

I ain't got I ain't got a parasites, man.

Okay, my girl, three minutes, she ain't giving I ain't gonna I ain't got a parasites, man.

It's not something that's transmitted.

It doesn't come from another another human being.

It just develops in one out of every three or four million people.

You actually have

You try to tell me I don't know why I was three million, man.

You don't come all life like that.

I ain't got a parent, man.

Right.

There's something else that you have that I haven't told you about.

There's something else I need to tell you.

What the f else would I got?

Brian, you just got pranked.

You just got pranked by nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey Morning Show.

Your wife Anika got me the prank phone call you.

I be d man.