Mama's Maple Tree Hit

How many of y'all your mama still live at the same place where you grew up at?

And it's just some memories all around the house.

You know what I mean?

That tree, that that car that's out there, the garage, where you used to play hide and go seek, where you used to jump rope.

Remember back in the day the screen, though.

Come on, man.

You ain't forgot that.

But check this out.

The truck driver, Lloyd, gets a phone call and ain't backing down.

This back down memory lane right here, y'all.

Close your eyes.

You at your mama house.

You better not mess up nothing at all.

My mama.

Hello?

Hello, man.

I'll speak to uh Lloyd.

Yeah, this Lloyd.

Who is this?

Terry?

Who?

I'm about 10 minutes from the yard, big dog.

This ain't no damn terror.

Look, man.

Is this Lloyd that work for Triple A Cooper?

Yes, sir.

Listen, you just came down the street and hit me and tore all the limbs off my mama maple tree that's hanging over the street.

And now she got limbs hanging all in the street.

We got to cut this whole tree down because you done messed it up and you the one that just drove through here.

Hey, sir, I ain't been down the street today, sir.

Say what?

I ain't been down street today.

I don't I ain't been in no residential neighborhood today.

You just came down the street a couple hours ago and then tore all the limbs off my mama tree.

My mama, that tree been in our family 25 years, and you just came down the street and just tore it all apart.

Sir, I ain't been down today.

How did you get this number by the way?

Don't worry about how I got your number.

Somebody got to pay for my mama treat.

Well, sir, I ain't been down today.

I'm sorry.

Call it, call him back, dog.

Hello.

Lloyd, did you just hang up on me?

Yes, sir.

I told you I didn't been down no damn today.

Now sh now what?

Look, I told you you just came down f<unk> and just and just told my mama tree up all the link.

Quit calling my phone with that d.

Look, my grandmama planted that tree.

Now you done got the nerve who planted it.

Move the f it in.

Cut the branches off.

It's them branches.

Is clear enough.

You're not supposed to be driving them 18-wheel trucks down this residential area like this here.

Man, I was making a delivery.

Now, if I had to come down that damn street, I would have, but I told you once I ain't came down no damn street today.

You just said you had to make a delivery.

Now you saying you ain't been down street.

I said if I had to make a delivery down there, I would have came down that damn street.

I ain't had to come down there.

You've been on the street today.

Now that part I do know.

And what you got the wrong driver, dude.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I got the right driver.

And what I do know is you done told my mama tree up.

We got to cut this old damn tree down.

And you know what?

You gonna pay for this.

And I ain't paying for a b say that damn tree.

That tree can kiss my.

I know you ain't talking about my mama tree.

Well, guess what?

Take your tree and take your damn mama, and both of y'all go out there and plant another tree then.

We ain't planting no more trees.

That tree been in our family for years.

You gonna mess around and get your swoop behind this tree.

Bring it on then.

Bring your f on and bring the tree with you.

You're gonna make me whoop your with a branch off that tree.

Well, I tell you what.

If you that bad, then I tell you what.

If I was on the street today, I'd meet your on c with the d tree.

You come on over here to c right now.

Cause I'm right out here in the street on the cardless phone.

You come on outside.

My mama's sitting up in there crying behind this street because you done told the limbs off of it, and we got to cut it down now because you done messed it up.

Go get her a nail napkin and tell her wipe her damn eyes then.

I ain't been down no street.

I know you ain't sitting here talking about my mama now.

See, you tripping now, dog.

You tripping, dog.

You already know you.

Look, man, I grew up with this tree in my front yard.

I grew up with this tree.

Now you got the nerve to drive through here, driving too fast.

Because if you would have drove slow, you wouldn't have been hitting all them limbs like that.

Y'all be running down here too fast through here.

Ma'am, look here.

I done told you once, man.

I ain't been down no street.

Now, like I told you.

If you want to meet me on g then we will.

Alright.

Now I'm sorry about your mom tree and, but hell, it ain't nothing I can do about it because I ain't been down no g street.

It's one thing you can do about it.

You can pay for it, and that's what you gonna do.

Now you're gonna either give me some money or I'ma get it out, your but you gonna you gonna you coming over here.

Matter of fact, you can go and come over here now.

Turn that big truck around and bring your butt on over here right now.

Well, I might as well go on and turn it around because I ain't paying for no g tree.

I can take that shit right now.

That's fine.

That's fine.

But I tell you when you get here, my cousin here and all my uncles is here sitting up here looking at out what you done done to this tree.

So bring your ass on.

Yeah, well, look here.

Take that tree and and stuff it up you all your your ass, alright?

I ain't finna worry with you in this tree no more because I done told you once.

Let me finish with your tree.

You come on right now because you don't know what this tree means to me.

This tree right here used to be home base for hide and go see.

Oh, you crying?

You big, you crying too?

Man, look here, dog.

I ain't f with y'all tree, dog.

Look at that.

Wipe your eyes and the hell with you, this tree right here.

I'm turning my around.

You just meet me on f street, alright?

Let me tell you something.

This tree used to be first base for kickball.

Do you hear me?

Man, you that damn kickball sh dude.

I done told you once I ain't f with no tree, alright?

Don't f with LL around this, dude.

Your name Lloyd, but you ain't AL.

A L is cool, J.

And he would not, he would not have come down here and told up my mama tree.

He is not that kind of person.

But you, you lower.

You crying for, man.

What the f you crying for?

Cause you done messed up my mama tree.

You sound like a big old girl.

I'm crying because my mama tree broke.

Let me tell you something.

You can your truck around and bring your down to the shit.

I be there and g me.

10 minutes to meet your on the wheel.

Well, it's gonna be more than me.

My uncles is here, my cousin is here, all of them.

Oh, the Braderbrunch family, huh?

Whatever.

I tell you what.

But I'll tell you right now, it's gonna be hot water in this fate.

Don't make me no different.

They call you L L.

Mama said knock you out.

And that's what you finna get, L L.

Yeah, well, come on with it then, baby, because I'm here.

All right.

Well, listen.

Ain't no running.

Listen, I'm finna tell you one more thing about this treat.

Is you listening to me?

I'm listening, bruh.

Is you listening?

I done told you one.

I don't give a damn about that tree, but if you want to talk about it, go ahead.

Let me tell you something.

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvin Morning Show.

You just got pranked by your boy Joseph.

Man, look, man, f all that.

What did you just say?

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvin Morning Show.

You just got pranked by your boy Joseph.

Damn.

You got to be f kidding me, man.

Damn, man.

Ain't no tree messed up.

And you ain't been on the street, dog.

Jojo when I see his man.

What is the baddest radio show in the land?

Steve Harvin Morning Show, man.

Hey, man.