The Noisy New Neighbor

Let's go, kid.

Hello?

Hello, I'm telling uh Marcus, uh Marcus.

Yeah, this is me.

Hey, can you hear me?

Can you hear me pretty good?

Yeah, I can leave, man.

Glad.

Hey, hey, listen, um, hold on.

Let me turn the radio now for a second.

Go ahead.

Hey, hey, listen, I live in in uh I live in an apartment building that you just moved into.

Um, I live in 21A, uh and you live above me uh in 22A.

Uh-huh.

I actually got your number from the leasing office.

I told him I wanted to welcome you to the apartment building, man, but uh I d I don't want to really raise no eyebrows, but I was really calling about you know, yo, first of all, let me go ahead and say welcome.

to the building, man.

I hope that you and your your uh is that your wife that lives with you.

First of all, thank you, brother.

I appreciate it.

But uh why would you need to have my number to do that?

You could have just came and knocked on my door, man.

Well yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well see what a reason why I mean I really called and got the number was kind of reach out to you man.

I don't be wanting to start no trouble with nobody or nothing like that.

I'll be wanting to you know I wanna I want my neighbors to be cool with me and I want to be cool with my neighbors, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah that's cool.

So I I was reaching out man because you know the the noise man I was I'm um I work at night and I I sleep during the day man but it seems like since you guys moved in man in the middle of the day is is you know I I mean I I know what it's like to have a lady.

Hold up hold up hold up hold on you're hearing noises coming from my place in the middle of the day?

Right, I mean I I'm I'm hearing I I'm I'm guessing I'm hearing you making love to your lady man I mean

now man nah nah you know what it is you might be hearing something from another another unit man.

It's definitely not coming from us 'cause I'm at work and my you know my girl is there but she on the computer, you know she's looking for a gig right now.

Hello okay, okay, okay wait a minute now.

Sir you live in apartment twenty two A, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

See I live in twenty one A.

Your your bedroom is above my bedroom.

Wait a minute, hold on, hold on.

You telling me that you hear noises that sound like somebody's making love coming from my crib at this time of day and I'm not there and only my woman is there, boo man.

You know, again, I'm not trying to be rude and say I I appreciate you calling and and you know neighbor and all that.

21 A you shake you in, right?

Uh yeah yeah.

Yeah, yeah, look, I mean you called me, all right?

So let's get to the bottom of this one time.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, you know what, man, this probably just a big mistake.

I mean, maybe she just hanging some pictures or something, bro.

I hey first.

You know what?

Let me tell you.

Hey, hey, man, listen, um, Marcus, I l uh, I apologize.

I thought I'm I'm I'm I'm you know I'm no no, my man, you telling me I'm a man.

You understand what I'm saying?

I don't know what you are, but I'm a man.

No, I I'm I'm understanding.

You calling me telling me you hearing noises coming from my crib that sound like somebody

and now you telling me don't worry about it, maybe you made it.

Hey, hey man, all I'm saying is maybe it's just a a legitimate mistake.

I don't say maybe she's hanging some pictures or moves and furniture or something like that.

It shouldn't be no noise coming from my crib.

Oh hey, man, I ain't trying to I ain't trying to start no trouble, man.

What you tell me about, man.

All I was calling about was trying to get a decent decent rest, man.

I work at night, bro.

That's all I'm talking about, man.

I'm not trying to s I don't give a f if you want the graveyard shit.

I don't care.

You calling me telling me about my grandma that I just moved into.

You hear noises.

Ain't no one going on like that.

I ain't believed it.

Oh, you got the right adjust.

What you look at, man?

You live on your

Yes, man, in apartment twenty-one A, and your place is above mine, man.

Hold on, man, hold on, man.

Hold on.

You pull this up over, man.

Hold on, one second, man.

Oh, dude.

Hey, man, look, I'm not I'm not trying to have no trouble, man.

I'm not trying to have no trouble.

You think you're working there, dude?

I do fifty hours a week, man.

Okay, okay, though.

I'm not all I'm saying is, man, I thought I thought you were making love to your w your woman, man.

That's what I thought.

I call you to ask her to keep the noise down.

I don't want to write my white.

I ain't even in my ass right now.

Call him my hang up.

Just that you can hear this anyway, eh?

And I'm coming right to your club to hear it.

Come on, move from your club.

No, no, hold on.

Hold on, hell up, dude.

You're not coming to my apartment to hear nothing, man.

I ain't got nothing to do with this.

Don't try to say you don't know me.

I ain't letting you in my house, man, about no f man that you got going on upstairs.

You gotta control your woman, man.

That ain't got nothing to do with me.

I know she's been I know she's been out here.

I know she's been out there weighing it out for the last two weeks between 12 and 2.

I know that.

You got to be

you talking a danger, man.

I'm coming to your f house.

You ain't coming to my apartment, man.

I'm not in hey, man.

Listen, uh uh no.

I ain't got nothing to do with this.

I'm telling you.

I got one more thing I need to say, you man.

Did you listen?

I got one more thing I need to say, all right?

All right, you better do listen.

They better be telling me you opening the door.

Are you listening?

Yeah, I'm listening.

This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey morning show.

You just got pranked by your own boy.

Wait a minute.

Oh what the free 21A, man.

Step away from 21A, please.

This is now you time from the Steve Harvey morning till your boy got me to prank you, man.

Oh

damn.

Are you at 21A?

Dude, I'm right outside my apartment, man.

I'm ready to blow ass hang up, man.

Yes, nephew, Tommy.

Just tell me, man.

How you doing, brother?

Oh man, man, Tommy, you you had me going, man.

I was coming to Up, man.

I'm serious, man.

I got one more thing I gotta ask before I let you go, man.

What is what is the baddest radio show in the land, man?

Man, it's the Steve Harvey morning show, without a doubt.

Hey man, step away from 21A.

Step away.

Step away.