Church Late Fee

Hello?

Hello, I'm trying to read Swiss Trace.

Hey, you got her.

Hey.

Uh, how you doing?

This is uh this is Brother Glenn from the church.

Hey, Brother Glenn, how you doing?

I'm good.

I'm good, I'm real good.

Uh did you enjoy service morning?

Oh, I I enjoyed it.

Pastor.

Pastor brought it down.

Yes he did.

Oh my God.

That was a word for me.

Right, right, right, right.

So, what do I owe the pleasure of this call?

Uh I wanted to give you some information that the um that the church has come up with and we wanted to let you know what was going on before next Sunday.

You I I didn't interrupt you, did I?

Uh no, no.

I actually uh I I I may sound a little a little off a little bit.

I'm trying to to get dinner ready for my little babies, my little darlings and I'm trying to your voice sounds so familiar to me.

It just sounds so familiar.

I'm trying to place place that voice.

Okay, well you've seen me at the church quite a few times.

I think I have.

I I'm just trying to place it.

I I can't place it right now.

But what can what can I do for Glenn?

Well nevertheless, I I just wanted here's here's what's going on.

Uh now are you aware that for the last uh the last six Sundays you've been actually uh coming into service late.

Have you realized that?

Yes, I I um I I know I uh I'm sorry about that, but uh I you know, yes I have I have my reason so.

Okay.

Okay, well here's what's going on.

The officials at the church have uh gotten together and this is what they've decided on is that anybody who is late uh starting next Sunday, there would be a fifteen dollar charge for that for coming in and disrupting services.

That that could not come at a worse time.

I don't have fifteen dollars to give no I don't I don't have it.

Uh oh.

Um look, I'm sorry, I'm sorry that we're late.

I I I am.

Uh we we are doing our best.

I I have three kids.

I have three young kids, two, seven, and nine, and they are a handful.

And and and we we do the best that we can to get to church on time.

And and to tell you the truth, when we get there, it's during praise and worship.

I mean, Pastor ain't even preaching yet.

So I know it's not pastor's not up yet, but he's he's stating that uh people coming in, it just seems very disruptive to the service that's going on.

That's So, nevertheless, like I said, this is a warning call, you know, to let you know that if you are late on next Sunday, then they they will be charging you fifteen dollars uh a late charge.

And then actually you won't be able to even come in until you uh until you pay for $15.

I can't even get in church with with look okay, look.

I don't I don't owe nothing.

I don't owe you no explanation.

But I need to tell you something.

We are me and my kids for the last few Sundays that we've been late, it's because my car broke down.

We we are on the bus, man.

Public transportation.

Okay.

I mean I and I understand, I understand I sympathize with everything that you're going through.

But why are you calling if you understand why you calling me about $15 if you understand what I'm going through?

Well, I didn't I first of all I didn't know what you were going.

Why are you raising your voice at me?

Why are you raising did you just raise your voice at me?

You know what?

You know what?

I think you're raising your voice at me.

How dare you call me about this about a feat?

And I'm there at church.

I got my kids there trying to raise them up is where they should go, just like the Bible say.

And you know why I gotta do this and why I'm late, why m why we gotta catch the bus.

Do you understand why that is, Brother Glenn?

No, I do not.

That is because they daddies ain't and they yes.

So Tracy, just you got to calm down a little bit now.

Uh oh, Jesus, help me, Jesus, help me, Jesus.

Okay, listen.

Uh here's the deal.

All I can do is tell you this.

I hope you can make it.

Maybe you can catch an earlier bus, you know what I mean, and get there a little earlier.

But but I'm just stating the facts that as of next Sunday, if you come in late, it's fifteen dollar late fee, and that's what you'll pay in order to get in the service.

You know what?

Well, maybe next Sunday I just won't be there.

How about that?

You know, I'm already working six days a week.

The only day I have off is Sunday.

I've been breaking breaking my back.

Do you know I work two jobs?

I work two jobs, and they always trying to take money out of my check.

Always trying to pull me here and there, and I'm always tired.

I get tired Two hours of sleep, and then now the church wants to dump another $15 charging me for being at church when that's what I'm supposed to do.

But you're coming in late though, Sister Tracy.

You know what?

You know what?

Late ain't bad.

Okay.

I I might be delayed, but I ain't denied.

And I'm getting there the best way that I know how.

We're on the bus.

I have to put my kids on the school bus.

And not only have to dip them on the school bus, then I have to get on the bus to move myself to work because I don't have a car because they daddies ain't doing nothing, nothing for them.

Do you understand what I'm saying to you?

I need to under

Daddy Daddy number one, guess what?

He ain't daddy number two.

He in jail, been there about five years.

He ain't and daddy number three, huh?

He decided to go ahead and walk out.

He ain't I ain't heard from that trifling in about seven months.

Now he know we're struggling.

He had the nerve to take my wallet too.

You don't you don't even understand what I'm going through.

You don't even understand that I'm trying to make a better life for me and my children.

There is one more thing, Sister Tracy, that the church wants you to know before next Sunday that you definitely need to know.

And what one more thing does the church want me to know besides $15?

The church just wants you to know that this is nephew Tommy from the Steve Albert morning show.

Your sister Patrice got me to prank phone call you.

I am gonna walk her.

I'm gonna whoop her.

I'm gonna whoop her out.

You know I ain't got time for that.

No, I ain't got time for that.

Oh, Patrice.

Uh huh.

You alright?

Oh, I got something for her.

How about that?

She's always said, she said, my sister Car broke down.

She says she got these kids.

She over there struggling, struggling.

She's trying to make it.

But you gotta give her a hard time.

She just wanted to she wanted she wanted you to put a she wanted to put a smile on your face.

Well, she did well, once been settled, I I'm gonna have to say she did.

Okay.

You alright?

Wow.

Now that I know you y'all were joking and now I know this is nephew Tommy.

Hey, I gotta ask you something, baby.

What's the baddest and I mean the baddest radio show in the land?

The Steve Harvey Morning Show, baby.

And there you have it with the church fees.

And those that have paid and not paid, we know who they are, because those that are upset about me bringing it up, we can tell that they are a little bit spicy about that.

Yeah, have you paid yours?

Oh yeah, my wife paid out here.

We uh don't worry, don't worry about mine.

Right, yeah.

Y'all ain't gotta worry about me.

I got a locker in heaven and everything.

They I'm they waiting on me.

You know this for sure.

I'm gonna go.

What?

Girl, my name is at the gate.

You better ask you.

We're gonna be right next to the house.

We're gonna be so far from Lloyd.