Steve Harvey Book Prank

So what are you saying?

I'm saying to you right now that he trying on everybody.

He's hitching onhing to do with me, man.

That ain't my book, that's his damn book.

Put him on the phone then.

I'm gonna tell him I ain't nobody scared of Steve.

He ain't writing about you.

Yeah, yeah, he did.

He done told on me.

He done told on all my boys.

He telling on everybody, man.

Hey dog, his book ain't got nothing to do with you, man.

No, no, no, but his book do got something to do with me.

Because everything that Steve done learned after he was growing up from the hood, telling on everybody.

And I'm tired of this.

He ought to go somewhere and sit down.

Hey, dog, dog, you gotta be gift right with your girl.

Listen, if he's schooling my girl, he Got no business coming in my house in my car, telling every damn thing.

So Hello?

Hello?

Who who who is this?

Who is this?

Hold on, man.

This Steve Harvey.

Who is this?

This is Chuck P, man.

Listen here, man.

Okay, I was on the phone with your nephew, and I'm just saying this to you, Steve.

Okay?

All love to you, dude.

I see you on the front of the entrance.

I see you on the on the family field on your radio show.

So why don't you go somewhere and sit down and quit telling on everybody?

I mean it's on everything, Steve.

I'm riding the car with my family.

I gotta turn my radio off because you telling game.

We grew up sticking together.

If I run in a little gang to make my ends meet or whatever it is, that's my business.

You ain't got no business telling on me.

Hold up, hold on.

Oh, wait a minute.

First of all, I don't know who you are.

I know you don't, but I know who you are, and we listen to the show.

Okay.

Hold on, hold on.

First thing you're gonna do though, back up a little bit, dog, because you're talking to me crazy.

Hey, Steve, ain't nobody scared of you because you got money.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

This ain't got nothing to do with no money.

And I ain't gonna be too many.

So why don't you

just enjoy your life?

You find the perfect wife for you.

You found the perfect person, the perfect relationship.

Okay, that's good.

God bless me.

Hold on.

Don't put God in this.

Leave God out of this, because you ain't calling from the God angle.

See, people kill me with that part right there.

God bless you.

Don't throw God.

You don't want God to bless me because you're talking too crazy to me.

That's for starters right there.

But since you talking crazy to me, let me turn you on to something.

You out there running game.

That's your problem.

Run your game.

You can't get mad at me because I'm doing what I do.

See, man, y'all kill me.

You out there doing what you want to do, like you all of this right here.

Then you coming to me because I'm trying to empower somebody.

I don't give a damn about you, man.

Feel how you want to feel about me.

But what you ain't gonna do, though, is talk to me like you crazy.

Cause I ain't that.

Wait a minute, Steve.

Let's make the player feel fair, okay?

You got the airways, you got the microphone.

You got the ability to touch a lot of people, okay, and you just telling.

You're a walkie talking.

Hold on, hold on, hold up.

This ain't got nothing to do with the airways.

This ain't got nothing to do with the media.

This just me and you talking.

I can talk to you personally.

Personally, me and you can talk.

Anytime I don't talk

about it.

You call.

You talking all this yet.

See, it's people like you, man.

You know why I wrote a book in the first place?

Because you always somewhere trying to act like you're something that you ain't.

Now you got the source on the phone.

Now you're trying to make about money and the meat.

This is me and you, just two men talking.

Not what you want.

Then if it's two men then talking in from one man to another, why don't you just go somewhere and sit down and quit telling?

First of all, I ain't got to sit down.

You already doing nothing as it is.

See, the soon as somebody go out and do something, try to do something positive.

You got some old shaking big chilly wag like you sitting up in here, man, wanting to go sit down somewhere.

I ain't going sitting down no damn where.

You can mess me with that.

I say what I want to say.

And who are you anyway?

You ain't even doing nothing.

Hey, don't tell me I ain't doing nothing.

I tell you what I am doing.

I'm trying to do something, but every time I take a step, you take two steps.

I can't wait.

Hey, hey, hey, hold on.

What can you say?

Yeah, y'all kill me.

Why don't you quit trying and do something?

You all kill me, man, with that old you trying to do something.

Why don't you do something, dog?

You send up in here talking to me about what you trying.

You probably selling that same thing to your people.

You trying.

When are you tired of me and trying stuff?

When you gonna do something?

I'm doing something right now, Steve.

Well now you walk in here on the floor.

You can be improving your relationship with your girl or whoever you're trying to get it together with.

But you're on the phone with me complaining because I done wrote a book.

Man, don't read the damn book.

You probably ain't read it no way.

And don't watch the TV show.

You probably ain't working enough to pay the bill no high.

Hey, look, wait a minute, dude.

You don't know nothing about me.

Okay, you don't know nothing about my finances.

You don't know how

your finances.

This about you as a man.

Here's what y'all do to me.

Here's what y'all do to me.

Y'all always talking to me on an email somewhere.

You always on the blog talking about me.

You don't even know me.

Then when you give me face to face, you want to bring up money.

This conversation ain't got nothing to do about money.

I ain't brought up money one time.

This about manhood.

Now why don't you do that right there?

Wait a minute.

No, Steve, it ain't about money now, because you got it.

Okay, cuz you got it.

When you was broke, I bet that wasn't your attitude.

Guess what, though?

Hey, man, guess what?

When I was broke, though, I was working.

I wasn't sitting on the phone crying to some other man by what he making me feel with my wife.

Yeah, a time I take a step forward.

You got me taking two steps up.

That's why you ain't taking step short.

Give me I tell you something.

You just got Frank off.

I'm seeing you.

I just

I just

got the

Uncle Steve has been cranked.

Oh God.